Whether or not you choose to adopt ‘I’m OK – You’re OK’ as a life philosophy, Transactional Analysis can be a useful tool for thinking about interactions in a slightly different way. Transactional Analysis (TA) is a theory for practice. The more spontaneous and honest you can be, the more accurate the results probably will be. I'm voting to close this question as off-topic because I think it's better suited to, Transactional Analysis: Dealing with a “Rebellious Child” [closed], Goodbye, Prettify. How to deal with someone who ignores your lack of knowledge? Transactional analysis is a technique which helps to understand the behaviour of other person so that communication becomes effective. Want to improve this question? By using our site, you acknowledge that you have read and understand our Cookie Policy, Privacy Policy, and our Terms of Service. Are you asking from the perspective of a boss/parent/teacher/senior/colleague/peer/stranger? It can be either that I get the feedback "I do not want", or I get complete silence (and eventually a very expressive face). Only the Adult can decide on and maintain this position. Is there an ‘Adult’ in an infant? They continue, all their life, to seek out rewards and praise from those who are bigger or more important than them, to validate themselves, and make themselves feel more ‘OK’. Parents spend a lot of time telling children not to do things, as a normal part of helping them grow up into a civilised and functioning adult.

I am at a complete loss when another person seems to be in such an ego state and just refuses to cooperate. It only takes a minute to sign up. I hope it works out for you :). To find out what training is available in your region, visit the website of the TA association nearest you. The kitchen is dirty and I'm feeling really tired today. Something must be done!" I was not aware of this, and I was not aware of the "academic-research" tag either. Parents spend a lot of time telling children not to do things, as a normal part of helping them grow up into a civilised and functioning adult. What I believed as the most important, is to acknowledge from the start the possibility of refusal as a normal part of the negotiation, and present observations and feelings over authority. I compiled the results in this article. Swapping out our Syntax Highlighter, Hot Meta Posts: Allow for removal by moderators, and thoughts about future…. Does talking about mildly taboo topics with people normalize the subject for them?

However, their fundamental position does not change: they still feel, deep down, that they are ‘Not OK’. NVC proposes it's own codified way to ask this question. Helps prev…. A Rebellious Child would be someone that responds to a poor evaluation with rebellion: If people don't appreciate what I do, I might as well not try at all or do things wrong on purpose.

How can I measure correctly with a ruler? Does that apply to me? An exchange of strokes; the unit of social intercourse. There are plenty of ways for this to happen and have a lot to do with how you ask. Imagining here someone told you "no" I wouldn't assume here it would be because of rebellion, because there is no need to rebel anything against, since I only asked for a favor.

If you’re starting from ‘I’m not OK’, then you probably want to either: This is where Transactional Analysis is really useful in practical terms. Transactions are the everyday currency of human interaction. It aims at application. What's the word for asking someone to deliver their promise?